10.14.2009

This is a break from my Ethiopia Trip posts.

Last week I applied for a seasonal, part-time job. I had an interview yesterday and am scheduled for an orientation next Thursday, followed by a two week training. I got a job…..JUST LIKE THAT.

Yesterday, after the two interviews, data entry and grammar test–I felt really good. Like I was needed and wanted.  Honestly, it’s the best I’ve felt since returning from from Ethiopia. I was excited. My personality changed instantly.

WHAT?

Today, I feel like “what am i doing”. This will totally disrupt everything in my household and it will be totally chaotic. I’m not ready for this jump. AND FOR WHAT? So I can “feel good”.  I fail to notice—or honestly—run away from the people and “job” where I am needed most. RIGHT HERE–AT HOME–WITH MY FAMILY.  I’m having a really hard time right now and have been for a while.  When I really stop and think about it THIS IS WHAT I REALLY need to be working on and this my “JOB” for now.

Just some random thoughts as I’m 2 hours into my day today.

I’m feeling a little out of sorts right now.

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2 responses to “10.14.2009

  • Marilyn

    Don’t know if this will help or not, but some people I know, who shall remain unnamed but have been in a cancer whirlwind this past year, have opted, from time to time, when things are just spinning just a little too fast, for a MORATORIUM on MAJOR DECISIONS for an agreed set period of time.

    I – uh, I mean “this person” – once heard it said “no major decisions within six months of having a baby” and thought it good advice for many other times of life as well.

    Signed,
    Anonymous 🙂

  • Bethany

    Maybe starting a new job will clear things out in your mind about whether you would rather be at home (or not).

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